1. YOUR FEAR OF FLYING, EXPLAINED. (7 Min read)

IF YOU'VE EVER WONDERED WHY YOU ARE LIKE THIS? THIS IS FOR YOU. (LONG BUT WORTH IT.)

OUR BRAINS HAVE ONE MISSION. It does this above all others.

KEEP THE HUMAN ALIVE. And it does that by keeping us “safe” (This is the Rule #1)

1. Our brains are also prediction machines. Predicting what comes next is a very useful tool in keeping us safe.

- we daydream about 30 percent of the day, running “simulations” to predict outcomes of things going on in our lives.
- our brain loves patterns, because it helps us predict the next thing.

2. Our brains treat the unfamiliar, or unknown as possible danger. Every time.
It’s motto would be “Protect Human First. Ask questions later.” because assuming something questionable might be safe is a bad strategy for the brain. “What if it’s not safe?” is a better strategy to protect the human.

The brain can be wrong about it’s safety and still protect the mission if you err on the side of “Assume danger first” rather than “Assume it’s Safe” Better safe than sorry, right?

3. Our brains strive to not waste precious energy on things that it can automate. It automates anything that is repetitive.

We learn how to walk, we struggle at first. Our brains are very involved in every movement. “Hold onto something. Lift left foot up. Balance on right. Move left foot forward. Place left foot down. Shift weight from back foot to front foot”

Once we’ve done that enough times with success, the brain automates the process so we don’t have to think about each step. It’s called “chunking” and it essentially chunks together things it now knows is “safe” and doesn’t need much brain power to complete.

If you ever learned to drive, and now drive “automatically” it’s the same process. Your brain has been trained that this is familiar and that you can automate it. So we jump in the car, thinking about a conversation we had with our husband, and drive to the store, but we can’t really remember that drive.

This conserves precious energy and leaves the brain available to do other things instead.

OUR BRAINS HAVE 2 SYSTEMS it runs all day every day similar to software on computer. One in the foreground and one in the background.

This is the order they run in, when things are feeling safe.

Logical System 90% foreground(approx) This is the thinking brain. The one that makes you think What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just think my way out of fear of flying.

Survival System 10% background (approx) This is the protective brain. It follows RULE #1 exclusively, and doesn’t answer to any logic (This is the one that makes you panic when you get on the plane)

But if you feel like a threat is arising? It switches in a nano second to:

Survival System 95% (or more)
Logical System (under 5%)

When this happens it feels like our logical side is shut down, and it kind of is. It’s locked out during what the brain perceives and an emergency. Because when the human is in danger, only thing needed is the Survival System to get you to move away from the threat and to safety. You do not get time to “think it over”

THE SURVIVAL SYSTEM USES FEAR AND PANIC to get us to take action and move away from the danger or threat it feels and save the human’s life. (Rule #1)

It’s actually a normal and useful way for the brain to work. When there is real danger? We NEED this system to be lightening fast and LOUD so we CAN’T ignore it.

Imagine yourself standing on a wet cliff, right at the edge on a very windy day.
That poses a real threat to your safety.
The Survival System kicks in.

It initiates the feeling of fear to get you to notice quickly, and move back from the danger. You FEEL it.

If you ignore that?
The next level is PANIC. The brain STARTS SCREAMING and locking out any logic until something is done to move you away from the threat, NOW.

When you step back? The system dials it down again, you feel huge relief, and the logical system comes back online while the Survival system recedes into the background again.

When it’s working as designed, in a real danger? It’s a beautiful system. You don’t have to think, you just have to move. That awful feeling you get when you are panicking is exactly how the brain gets you to NOTICE AND ACT.

The problem with this system isn’t that it’s broken. It’s that the Survival system operates solely on feelings, can NOT tell the difference between real and perceived threats.

If it FEELS REAL? The survival system treats it as real. (Remember, Survival system likes better safe than sorry, right?)

For example? You are watching a scary movie on TV. The scary music amps up, you know something is about to happen… SUDDENLY something jumps out of the bushes when you weren’t expecting it, and what did you do? YOU jumped!

Right there on your safe sofa. In your living room where there is no threat. Your Survival System activated a tiny bit… because you were “feeling” something (just like the movie maker wanted you to).

To the survival system? The FEELING is REAL, so it goes into action to KEEP HUMAN ALIVE, BECAUSE it can not tell whether this is a real threat or not. Be alert! We can’t take a chance that this MIGHT not be real and therefore MISS a real threat.

So now let’s look at how this is working in your Fear of Flying.

Flying is unfamiliar.
Planes are unfamiliar
Turbulence is unfamiliar
Plane Sounds are unfamiliar
Being able to “float in the air” is unfamiliar

And anything “unfamiliar” feels like a possible threat to the Survival System.

So it’s no surprise that the survival system kicks in, to protect us from possible danger. And once it’s in motion it’s hard to dial it back down, using “just logic”

And if you continue to keep doing what it’s trying to protect you from? The Survival system get’s LOUDER. And LOUDER until you can NOT ignore it. This is you feeling panic now and your logical system is locked out so you can’t “talk yourself out of it”. It feels terrifying and like you are out of control.

AND in the name of being efficient and conserving energy, when you’ve done this enough times? (Got on the plane, Felt fear, ignored it, panicked.) The brain automates it, and starts to CHUNK the whole experience into one idea to keep you safe.

So now

Got on the plane, Felt fear, ignored it, panicked. Is automated and chunked to:
Plane = Panic. (It feels like a single movement now, not various steps)

And the prediction part of the brain adds in:
Plane=Panic as well, because remember the brain has started to see a pattern nowl.

So booking a flight, going to the airport, etc and in the same prediction.

Plane=Panic. (Engage Survival System to get to safety now!)

BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS:

The Survival System CAN be retrained. You can train it to stop treating the plane as a threat, because we know it’s not, logically, right?

Think about when you were a toddler learning to climb the stairs for the first time.

The stairs presented a challenge and a threat at the same time to you.

But you wanted to be able to do what everyone else was doing. So you started to learn to climb the stairs. Usually with some help (a parent watching over you)

You may have cried when you got half way up and looked back, realizing you were “in danger”.
You did it very carefully for a while. One step. Slowly. Next step, slowly. One by one.

But NOW? Stairs are familiar, and you run up and down them without a second thought.
Your brain has been trained that they FEEL FAMILIAR AND SAFE, (even if they are actually dangerous if you are not careful).

Your brain has been TRAINED.

So this is what we do. We TRAIN the brain. Step by step. So that we can lower our survival response when it comes to flying.

And that’s how we become “normal again”

It worked for me. I’ve flown fear free now for over a decade, after 25 years of sheer panic when it came to planes. I want the same for you now! And knowing this will help you get there even faster than I did!

I wish someone had told me this years ago, but now I'm telling you!

Next up, watch the videos below to see exactly how its done.

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STOP DREADING FLYING

Flying shouldn't feel like a survival test!

Learn how to beat fear of flying from an ex fearful flyer.

Learn how to beat fear of flying from an ex fearful flyer.